The truth about Friendzone

YAY!
exams finally overrrrrrrrrr!

my 2nd last paper was on saturday
and last paper was just now, yes extremely lousy planning on my part, but that doesn't stop me from whining :P
and finally i am done with year 2! :D
ok nothing much happy about this fact actually, that day while mugging in the library, yuanhong brought up the fact that the very silly and wild natured freshie me called them [who were 21 at that point in time] old.
he said, "eh, remember during engin camp, you said we very old right cuz we r 21...
BUT YOU ARE TURNING 21 THIS YEAR LEH"
ok i exaggerated the last part but u get my drift.
I AM BECOMING AN ADULT
and the government has to harp on that unfortunate sad truth by sending me a letter regarding some HOTA organ transplant thing. :(

ok enough with the whole whining about turning 21, not as if i can stop time :)
i shall embrace change and let nature takes her course
by...
enjoying this summer hols!!!

not that i am off to a very good start anyway, it was so "eventful" even dallan had to comment on it :(
so after paper, mingxiong drove us to OC, original plan was to catch avengers
but was too tired, only thing i wanted to do was rush home and SLEEP
anyway, met S and niang there!
oh and i still have the a&f smell in my hair too >< everytime go town will kena one
anyway, i am keeping my finger crossed ^^ S and niang too! :D



that day bestie and i were on a topic of friendzone.
friendzone - came from a 1994 episode of the sitcom FRIENDS [big fan of it, but i didn't know!]
 
initially i didn't agree with his definition of friendzone, he thinks that friendzone means one person will consider the other as purely a friend with nothing more than that developing.
which i do not understand really, i questioned if friendzone is this simple, why is it guys are so sour [yes guys admit you guys are sour, 9gag is filled with those posts that could only be fueled by jealousy]?
i insist there is the guy being made used component involved!
guy does nice things for the girl, girl, being well, human, with such mindset [why would anyone reject free things huh] kinda leads guy to think GOT CHANCE, but only to lead to disappointment on the guy's part.
now here's the funny part
then the guy complains he is being friendzoned because he felt that he had been made used of
^%*$&%&*&*^*&^)(*)
 
well the girl didn't do anything wrong alright!
boy, you volunteered! [this is written from a girl's point of view so guy readers bear with it eh, you might actually gain enlightenment into girl world :) ]

well, to give credit to him, he came up with the definition which we both agreed on so i will declare that to be the most accurate definition of friendzone
GUY LIKES GIRL, BUT GIRL JUST WANNA BE FRIENDS AND IS UNAWARE OF HIS ROMANTIC INTEREST
[the caps are to get your attention haha, not an expression of fury or anything]

no worries peeps! bestie came up with a solution though
solution - confession :)
well he did add that
"what if the guy did tell the girl and she tells him, let's just be friends, now that's friendzone level complete
if she pretends to consider while not really meaning to just because she likes the attention [sounds really familiar] - bitch level complete"

well then again, rejection doesn't always lead to moving on and hence stuck in the friendzone stage
to tell a guy to move on is easy, but paradigm shift, what if you are the guy, things aren't going to be as simple as ok i shall move on and ok i have moved on.


 
"human emotions are not always 100% logical, if it is all so easy to be logical, we all won't feel so much pain about it" -Mervin Law 2012
[HAHAHA, this is funny!!!]

anyway, now to the more serious stuff, bestie is a rather private person, but he is also a very literal dude
so i really want to share his talent [in writing soci-ish essays] [i asked for his permission for this to be on the blog]

Regarding friendzone,

"I think such phenomenon has been around since the beginning of human relations. The surface details may change the raw emotions behind have not changed much. 2000 years ago, women judged her mating date by the size of his club, today women do the same thing as well.
These clubs have changed in definition but the fact is there is some quality that mates attract in others, and those lacking of said qualities are excluded from the mating circle. 
 [heh, sorry just had to add this :P no harm intended!!!]
Sometimes, or most of the times, it happens subconsiously. It's not that they hate the other person, it's just that their brains over thousands of years of evolution tells them that there is no ramanticity involved. Today we call them friends, then even more recently, this concept called friendzone, probably started by a guy, and definitely popularized by guys, start to define these group of beings that seek a mate but lack the innate qualities his particular target seeks in reciprocity. It's actually nothing wrong about it - it is basic genetic layout. Basic law of nature - not all things attract. But maybe there is this overwhelming negativity directed at the rejectors, because nobody likes being rejected, so now there's this negative connotation associated with the term friendzone or rather, being friendzoned.

I really love that analogy about clubs , you can imagine the first human beings, or maybe you consider lesser animals with supposedly lesser intelligence. The first women probably "loved"men with the biggest clubs, or the ones who can hunt the best or the one who can fight the best. The physically weaker probably have no chnce at all. The smarter ones who tried to invent tools probably were the "weird"one who have no chance to get a mating date in those days because they were too weak to hunt right. Today, some women still love the men who join the buggest clubs, or the ones with the highest salary or the one with the best body.

I think for human, unlike animals, over time, things change the way we think. Things like education over the years, society pressures, expectations of the future will make people think twice about their choices. But beneath all the layers of human brain, the very fundamental animal brain is still the basic instinct to date the men with the best qualities, it is just over time, these qualities change.
The female peacock will only date the male peacock with the "chioest"feathers. Humans aren't that much different except the layers of human brain sometimes try to override this fundamental animal instinct.
Animal brain might think "that guy has the best figure, omg mate with him"
Human brain might say "ÿeah but he has a reputation of being a jerk so better not"
The weird